Project director Spaztique here.
To the folks follow the Imaginary Friends Research Group, I have some exciting news! The IFRG is eligible for tax exemption status and public funding! However, to do this, we need to convert our research group into a religion.
So, starting this April, we will be launching The Church of Imaginary Friends!
Rather than focus on psychology ideas for the betterment of folks across the internet for free, we are going to start charging folks for proprietary information! Now, before you worry about us becoming a "corporate" group or a "business," I'd just like to reiterate that the new Church of Imaginary Friends is a religion
, and therefore does not qualify as a business or corporation.
Under our new religious status, we can use our funding from our followers and other groups to fund new research, but more importantly, group "overhead."
What is "overhead"?
Well, overhead includes those small expenses that help keep morale high for those running the group. This includes:
- Food for all Church of Imaginary Friends staff.
- Vacation expenses for all Church of Imaginary Friends staff.
- Luxury cruises and jet airliners for all Church of Imaginary Friends staff.
- Prescription and totally legal drugs for all Church of Imaginary Friends staff.
- While we don't exactly condone this, we could use the money to hire prostitutes, but only as friends and for non-sexual purposes! Honestly!
- And while we definitely DON'T condone this, we could, in theory, and totally hypothetically, use this money to hire "certain businessmen" who can "remove" certain "business enemies." But we totally would never hire such people. Really. We totally don't have contacts on the dark web to hire these "professionals."
With your money, you will help the Church of Imaginary Friends running for years to come and keeping those at the top well-fed, well-vacationed, well-transported, and if they condoned such actions, partying like rockstars and literally murdering the competition (which we totally will not do).
As they say, it's best to keep 10% of the funds for yourself and 90% for the other expenses, and since the Church of Imaginary Friends is so humble, it will only keep that 10% for itself while graciously donating the other 90% to the staff to better their lives.
For more information on how you can start giving all of your money to the Church of Imaginary Friends, click here to watch this informational video!
Happy April Fools' Day,
-SpaztiqueBut seriously: your well-being shouldn't have a price tag. IFRG is, and will always be, a free resource for the mental and emotional health of the internet.